Red Band Society

A simple little show that turned out to be so much more than I thought it would be. Kids are just kids no matter where they may be, how their relationships evolve or whose spoons them. I took a special liking to the most unlikely character, Emma who was hospitalized for anorexia. Her relationship with her mother reminded me of my and Raja's and while she doesn't have an illness, our communication has changed and this show has made me realize more than ever how badly I need to fix it.

Prayer Changes

I've written a prayer for plans before and some of them actually came into fruition. Right now I don't know what my future holds. I cry and I pray, I cry then pray some more. I feel like everything is crashing around me, I've felt this before, how I got though it I really don't know. I'm not even sure I actually did. My daughter needs me and she won't admit it, but even if she did, I'm not sure I could help. There's a new feeling, I must really be in a terrible place. Praying some more...

Today...

I was emotional about almost everything. I didn't even get out of my pajamas and I, yes I baked! I made chocolate cherry cake and peanut butter muffins from scratch. I even ate real bacon in all its porky good and badness. Then I watched this movie... Mom's night out. It was good and unexpectedly inspiring. It's been forever since I've written anything, here or otherwise. How many times did I promise to rectify that? I even started three other posts recently that I've yet to finish. Well this is my attempt at doing it once and for all. Be it a story, a thought or even at times just a word, I'm writing it. I want to make my life have meaning even if only to myself. I have friends that I hardly ever see, and I miss them all terribly. I miss my daughter and my bdwpbff (you know who you are) too. I have so many thoughts, ideas and plans in my head, just dying to come out. Everything will be revealed in time. Stay tuned...